I’ve written about this a few times.
When we love someone or something so much, it can be hard to walk away. Or even worse, when we feel all we have is this one person, activity, experience, or job, it make us feel trapped without options.
Part of the human experience is that we refuse to see letting go in a positive light. We think it means we’re quitting or a sign of weakness. But really knowing when to walk, is about growth.
I most recently made a decision to let go of a relationship I’ve held dear for years. Oh, I was faithful. I was dutiful. I put 150% into every bit of the experience, but after a while I noticed the culture changing around me. The tone changed and I began to observe things that were just wrong on so many levels. The relationship became laced with ego, pride, jealousy, toxicity, and downright hate. I witnessed some of the most atrocious behavior that I decided to walk.
After 2 years of questioning myself over and over in agony about what I could have done differently, I came to this conclusion: I should have walked sooner.
I was allowing it to “happen”.
Here’s the crazy part. I had the intuition to walk sooner (and I even did leave) but I somehow let myself get sucked back in. I allowed myself to be begged and convinced, “It’ll be different this time.” Except it wasn’t. It just got more pathetic. Love and passion for something is something so hard to give up, yet now that I’ve freed myself, I feel refreshed to put my energy into something that aligns with my values.
Because friends, when you love something enough to let it go and have the patience to let the right things come to you, they do! And so do the right people.
My four pearls of wisdom for letting go. It’s not surprise they form the word “leap”.
L – LISTEN to your gut and LOVE yourself for having the courage to walk.
If something smells or looks wrong, it probably is. You know that old adage “where there is smoke, there is fire?” Go with it. And don’t beat yourself up over wanting to move on. Winners know when to take a different path, and it’s usually not the straight one. It’s often the hard and unpopular one.
E – Expect noise, discomfort, and critics. Extinguish them.
Stepping out to do something else, try something else, or walking away takes courage. Critics are like roaches – they hide in the walls and scurry across the floor when they think its safe. Expect their presence and just extinguish them.
A – Arm yourself with awesome people.
I’ve written and spoken numerous times over and over again about the need to have an amazing support network. With billions of people on this planet, you only really need a few. Quality, not quantity is important for the inner circle.
P – Purge other things.
As humans we tend to hoard things way too long. We hold on. The best part to letting go is it becomes like riding a bike once you’ve done it a few times. Use the training wheels but ditch them and free yourself to ride the big bike.
Let go. Leap. Grow!