Blog

Pacing Life with Negative People

Written by Katie Mehnert | Mar 20, 2010 10:29:00 AM

It can be challenging to have negative people in your life. You know ... The family or friend who is just never happy with what they have or the constant complainer thinking everyone is out to get them.


In my career I've had to move employees on or out of my team onto other projects. I see the same strategy can apply in a personal situation. One or two things happens:


1. The negative person has to be removed or moved on by you. ( This can be hard if you find it difficult to let people out of your life -very normal!) or


2. If you are lucky they become so unhappy they leave.


Sally* (names changed) was a girl who portrayed a rosy front on the outside. She glowed ear to ear until I started to get to know her more. The more I saw the more I felt sad for her. She could never be happy with her home or social life: absent husband, no children or career. She spent a lot of time focused on trying to bring down others that she brought down herself. Sally always thought everyone was out to get her and she never had anything nice to say about others. I was fortunate I never told her how I felt because she eventually retreated.


Negative people thrive on forming friendships and relationships with positive role models. Just as positive role models tend to want to motivate people without a framework to live happy.


They say you are what you eat and the friends you keep. So true!  Life is just one big marathon with 'stops' along the way (as my husband describes it).   Mark says it's about people who join you for the ride and some people drop off and join. 


Sometime you have people running with you side by side, sometimes ahead and sometimes you have to leave other behind. Not everyone can maintain your pace and level of enthusiasm.


When I run my own race (life) I try to not only be aware of where I am but be aware of who's with me and what 'place' they come from. I try and seek out people who want to learn and grow. I look out for potholes that are there to suck me in.

And then, with a head high and confident stride (sometimes slow!)...I keep moving.  


To your health..your race and pace...